Tag Archives: who even reads this nonsense

It builds character

You must experience hardship in order to grow.

Since I have suffered I am being developed into something better than my former version of me.
I have been single for one month now. There is a kind of freedom I am finding. It was not a fun decision to become single but it was my decision, and I have remained firm in the belief that it was the right one. I have decided that I do not have time for anything less than the best, and I used up my amount of ‘best’ with him. It still left a scar. All the same, trees cannot stand and grow without wind and I needed wind. Water that does not move stagnates and I was beginning to.

Let old things die.

It is very strange not to be someone’s girlfriend right now. But more than anything I am me. I advised a friend on this- I am free. I should like to be free for the rest of my life. Freedom does not mean alone always, freedom means I am free to choose. I will have to be very sure about something to stay with it ‘for the sake of it’.
If you are not prepared to walk away from something, that something will always have more control over you than you do. By calling bluffs and challenging everything, you retain control of your own life by expecting it to continuously meet higher standards.

I am the one thing in life I can (even somewhat) control.

Everything else is throwing yourself in the closest approximate direction and hoping for the best. Just like flying is throwing yourself at the ground and missing, success is throwing yourself at failure and missing.

I read a book by my grandfather that spoke of ‘a high tolerance for failure’ and stated that ‘anything worth doing is worth doing poorly until you can learn to do it well’. I adopt this mentality in my art now, learning to go with complete over perfect. This is the mentality I teach with my piano students. Start slow, start badly. The more you do it, the better you get.

I will never be satisfied with ‘good enough’, I seek to constantly improve and build higher. Each stage of life is a stepping stone to the next.

It’s Not A Neck Tattoo, It’s A Life Decision

Alternate titles for today’s post were as follows.

Neck Tattoos and Boyfriends
Please Don’t Flirt With Me (ft. I WILL Hurt You)

Dear the extremely creepy guys in the janky old car in drive through,
When you pull up to the drive through window and immediately lean forwards to stare at me, I see it. I know what you’re doing, and exactly where your eyes are lingering. (Here’s a hint, my face is up here. You know, with the eyes?)
Your cheekbone piercing is not attractive. You leering at me, looking me up and down before you hand me the money, or refusing to let go for just a split second too long, is not appreciated. Yelling at me as the window closes makes me want to ignore you.

When I open the window, before you grin, before asking if I have a boyfriend, I would like you to stop and think for just a moment, no matter how foreign this concept is to you.
I have been taking orders, making drinks, checking bags, paying out, and handing out food to customers like you for almost 2 hours now. As you speak to me, I have another order in my ear, and this person wants their order taken right exactly now and exactly right. I made at least four drinks while you stared at me, and have not stopped moving since I’ve been in your field of vision. And yet I have stopped all of my other tasks to focus on you. I hope you feel special.
Do I have a boyfriend, you ask?

The answer is no. But you don’t get to know that. If I answer you truthfully, you will take it as an invitation to press your advances on me. You will take it as a personal challenge to get me a boyfriend- probably you or your creepy friend. You will never leave my drive through, and I have times to make.
So yes. If you’re asking, I have a boyfriend.

I can see the frustration on your face.

“Are you just saying that?”

Now, isn’t that interesting. How many other girls have you interrogated?
How many have made the mistake of answering you truthfully?
Do you now expect women to lie to you as a default response?
I feel sorry for your previous interests. I wish you knew how to take ‘no’ for an answer.
Here’s your food! Have a great night, sir.